Ladies and Gentleman of the Blogosphere,

gavel photo

I apologize for arriving fashionably late. In my defense, I was born a month early so I’ve always reserved the right to take my sweet time (a quasi “mach Schnell” if you will). Also, I wanted to show up prepared and dressed as pretty as possible. This is my big day after all, and frankly I’m not the type of lady who would, for example, choose to wear the exact same cream strapless wedding gown as you, your bff, her bff and, well you get the idea. In fact, should I get married one day I’d wear a rainbow colored mini with thick straps just to prove a point. But that’s another story. Getting back to today’s big reveal, I’m actually going to do something very brave and totally out of my comfort zone: wear black. Gasp! Wait, let me guess: you own mostly black, think black is so “easy” and you’re just in L.O.V.E. with black! Well I’ve got news for you sister: the only women who own the rights to black are Coco Chanel and Angelina Jolie, and sorry gorgeous, but you’re not them and never will be. But that’s another story too. Today I’m donning a flowing silk black robe, slipping on my imaginary pair of black patent Louboutin pumps (hey a girl can dream! This is my blog after all!) and grabbing the chicest accessory possible: a gavel! I would prefer it be grey as that is my Signature Neutral Color (though I can already guess what your S.N.C. is and as aforementioned it’s sold out!). Oh and while I’m at it I might as well arrange my best messy side bun and rock an über-cool-kid pair of Ray Ban Clubmasters. So that’s it my new friends! I have officially arrived and the court is adjourned for a brief recess!

Modern Vintage (my kind of LBD)

Halston Gloss Effect Silk Dress, Shopsytle.com

Halston Gloss Effect Silk Dress, Shopsytle.com

Putting Myself on a Pedestal

Christian Louboutin Very Prive Patent Pump, Bergdorfgoodman.com

Christian Louboutin Very Prive Patent Pump, Bergdorfgoodman.com

The Better to See You With!

Ray Ban Clubmasters, Rayban.com

Ray Ban Clubmasters, Rayban.com

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “Ladies and Gentleman of the Blogosphere,

  1. Evie Ehrlich

    Hilarious and sassy a perfect introduction…really! Leaves me wanting more!

  2. Emily

    AMAZEBALLS! I love it. I will be sure to tune in for every schnepisode.

  3. Emily

    Also– is there a way to subscribe so we can an email alert every time there’s a new post?

  4. Emily

    ya but it doesn’t email you the entrees… you have to go out to a feed, right?

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